My son, Thing 1, is having and has been having bully trouble. We live on a dead end street. There are only eight houses on our street. There are four boys three of which are ten almost eleven and my son who is nine. They are all about the same size, actually Thing 1 is almost taller than the rest of them. We are at that point where the boys play together outside and we moms check on them very regularly but we are not with them at all times.
All that being said, we are having a rough start this summer. It isn’t a new thing that the neighbor kid bullies. Last year Jones and I decided the girls, Thing 2&3, would not play in the neighbors yard because of a couple of bullying issues. I walked out to check on the kids one day to find him dragging my daughter by her hair while she panicked and screamed. Then a couple days later my other daughter was running over to tell Thing 1 it was dinner time, I was right there, and the boys (both twice her age) ran after her and tackled her down. I dealt with the boys as calmly as I could and then we decided to not allow the girls to go out of our yard unless we were with them. It’s been different with Thing 1 though. He has fun with the boys and mostly didn’t have trouble with them except that the others get into fighting matches with each other and he would just come home (he didn’t like the conflict).
This summer is a different story. He is being actively bullied now. He has been blocked from leaving. Tackled down to the ground. Verbally abused. He never fights back. It just isn’t in he personality to do that. He will argue a valid point to the death but physical violence and just being verbally mean are a no go. I’m glad! But sheesh, I kinda wish he’d knock there block off! Maybe not, I know that would only be a different issue to deal with. He gets this from me mostly. I am highly non confrontational…. To a fault. I don’t know how to deal with this situation from the parental stand point. I have not spoken to the parents yet. Came close last year with the girls but we decided in the end that it was our responsibility to protect the girls and as long as they didn’t bully them in our yard we would be fine. Now I am facing my heart broken son and I don’t know. Do I talk to the parents and risk neighbor trouble? They are wonderful neighbors and I know they don’t approve of the behaviors, they just aren’t witnessing them. I am to the point now of just cutting off the friendships completely. It would be much easier if Thing 1 didn’t want so much to still be friends. He came home crying tonight because the bully was telling him the others boys hate him and don’t want to play with him and telling him he was going to tell them lies about him.
I think I have a plan in mind just wish I could spare my son this unnecessary pain.